Amelia Church of Christ - Christian Church in Amelia, OH near Cincinnati in Clermont County

Today we’re kicking off a brand new series called Decibels. Far too often, we think that following Jesus is this mild, almost weak kind of thing. Faith is this soft, meek, quiet thing. It doesn’t usually occur to us that our faith can be vibrant, and powerful, and even loud! But there is a call of God in the Bible to have just that kind of faith in our lives. His call on your life is to live your faith out loud. To crank up the decibels so that everybody can hear.

Understand that we’re not talking about a personality type here. Some of you are soft-spoken. People have to kind of lean in to even hear what you’re saying.

Others of you are naturally loud. When you go out to eat, the people in your booth have no trouble hearing you. Neither do the people five tables away.

But it doesn’t matter if you’re quiet or loud. We can all have a loud, vibrant faith because it’s based, not in the volume of our voice, but in the volume of our lives. How we live out our faith.

It’s a tragedy when a guy works somewhere for years and his co-workers have no idea that he’s a Christian. How sad is it when a lady connects with other parents at her children’s school, and yet never, ever lets her faith in Jesus out? It’s tragic that a Christian family can live in the same neighborhood forever and none of their neighbors know about their church.

The stakes are too high. The mission is too important. And the church has kept the volume down for far too long. It’s time to make some noise. It’s time crank the volume. It’s time to add some decibels to our faith. That’s what we’re talking about in this series.

So just how do we do this? How do we live out loud? How do we add decibels to our faith? Over the next five weeks, we’re going to talk about how we can live our lives in ways that will really set us apart from the crowd. We’re going to explore five different ways we can shout about God in our lives. We’re not talking about the old-time revival preachers who used to stand up and yell at you for two hours. You can shout without screaming because you do it by practically living out your faith for all to see.

And the first place where we can crank up the volume is in our friendships. Today we’re talking about how to shout with your friendships.

In the Old Testament book of Ecclesiastes, there’s a picture of three different kinds of friendships that we all need to have. And in each of these friendships, we find the potential to crank the decibels and shout about God to a world that is dying without him.

Let’s take at look at what God has to say about our friendships in Ecclesiastes 4. “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!

Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12, NIV)

There are three different kinds of friendships that God talks about in these verses, and we’re going to spend the rest of our time unpacking what he says about these relationships.

The first are serving friendships. The decibel level of our faith goes up when we shout through our serving friendships.

Look at verse 9 of our text. “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work.” (Ecclesiastes 4:9, NIV)

That might not strike you as the most profound Biblical truth you’ve ever heard in your life. On one level, this is super-practical common sense. You get more done faster if people are working together.

Even my three year old understands that. Like most kids, one of Ryan’s chores is to pick up his toys. It didn’t take him long to figure out that if mommy or daddy helps him, the job is much easier and it goes much faster. So whenever you tell Ryan to pick up his toys, his first reaction is, “You help me.”

On this level, this verse from Ecclesiastes doesn’t seem all that profound. But on another level, it is a prescription to pump up the volume of our faith. Our faith will always be louder and more vibrant and more impactful if we work in conjunction with other believers.

That’s where our serving friendships come in. The Bible tells us that, “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work.” When people come together in the church and work toward a common mission, the return from their work goes up and the volume of their faith goes up. This is one reason that unity is so critical in the life of the church.

Before he was arrested and put to death, Jesus prayed this prayer for all those who would come to faith in him. He prayed, God, “May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.” (John 17:23, NIV)

In his prayer, Jesus tells us the power of unity in the church. He prayed his followers would be unified “to let the world know” that God had sent him to die for our sins. When believers are unified in mission and purpose, then the world around them finds out about Jesus. That’s the power of unity.

And that’s also why Satan tries so hard to disrupt the unity of any and every church that he can. Because if he can get a church consumed with quelling squabbles inside it’s walls, then that church loses its focus to reach those outside its walls. It’s an incredibly effective strategy. There are so many churches that do nothing but play defense. The leaders of the church meet, but they do nothing but put out whatever fires happen to be burning at the time. They’re not leaders. They’re firefighters. And when Satan gets them focused on firefighting, he just makes sure to keep starting more fires.

When the people of a particular church are divided over a myriad of issues, those divisions breed tension. And that tension leads to distrust. And that distrust means that there will never be unity of mission and purpose.

God has called his church to play offense. To stop trying to fend off Satan’s attacks and go on offense and storm the gates of hell and rescue those who don’t know Jesus! But for a church to play that kind of offense, the church has to be unified. The church must be unified in purpose and in mission. The people of the church must genuinely care about each other, genuinely care about people outside of Christ, and genuinely care about the vision of their church to reach them. In short, the church has to shout through these serving friendships that our text talks about.

But what happens when someone just can’t come to an agreement with the vision of their church? It’s not that this person doesn’t love God. It’s not that they don’t know Jesus. It’s just that they’re not unified with the leadership or they don’t line up with a church’s vision. What then?

Craig Groeschel, pastor of LifeChurch, wrote, “To have a really healthy church, you need to develop a climate that allows people to leave your church gracefully.

The church I came from years ago was sort of like the movie The Firm. Once you were in, you could never leave–at least not without controversy.

If you left the church, many people thought you were:

1) Betraying the pastor

2) Abandoning your friends

3) Disobeying God

After someone left, they were treated like they were leaving Christianity. That’s a tragedy. People change. What they have to offer a church changes. What they need from a church changes. When things change, hopefully you will have created an environment that allows people the opportunity to move on without controversy and pain.”

Craig said that he has had people write thank you notes to him as they left the church where he pastors because they were allowed to do it graciously. He said, “When I see them in public, we don’t have hard feelings. They aren’t “trash-talking” our church. And they still love God… they’re simply worshiping Him at another church.”

The Kingdom of God is bigger than any one church. If someone leaves one church and begins worshipping at another church, they’re not lost to the Kingdom. And if we’re really all about building God’s Kingdom, then think about this…wouldn’t God’s Kingdom benefit if everyone found a place where they could really develop serving friendships? A place where they could be unified with a church’s vision and mission. A place where they could fully support a church’s leadership and work with them to win their community for Christ.

I know this is going to raise an eyebrow or two, but no one is held hostage here at Amelia. This isn’t The Firm. The past year has been one of clarifying our vision with our leadership, praying for God’s direction, and pursuing the future that God has called us to. That has meant some changes have been made. It means that more changes are coming as we pursue where God wants our church family to go. It’s possible that somebody here won’t be able to totally buy into what’s happening. They won’t be able to be in “complete unity” like Jesus prayed about. Does that make them a bad person? No. Does it mean that they aren’t a Christian? That’s ludicrous. It simply means that they aren’t unified with a church here. It doesn’t mean that they can’t be unified with a church here, or here, or here. And if after a time of prayer and seeking God’s will that person decides that the time has come to find another church to worship and serve with, isn’t the mature attitude to we wish them well? To pray God’s continued blessing on their life. Isn’t the mature attitude one that says that I won’t speak ill of you, you won’t speak ill of me? Isn’t the mature attitude one that says that we still love one another in Christ, we just worship in different churches? There would be a lot less heartache, a lot more unity, and a lot more people coming to Jesus if more churches would take this step of Christian maturity. Understanding that God’s Kingdom doesn’t revolve around our church. Our church is one of many in God’s Kingdom.

Unity isn’t just important; it is essential. It is Jesus’ prayer for his church. Connecting in serving friendships is critical, because that’s when we have “a good return for our work” like Ecclesiastes talks about. Our community will be won to Christ because of churches who are united in purpose and in mission. Our dream for our church is complete unity. Our goal is to deepen relationships with one another. To develop serving friendships, working together to crank up the decibels and shout Jesus to people who need him in their lives.

There is a second type of friendship to explore in our text: supporting friendships. The decibel level of our faith goes up when we shout through our supporting friendships.

Look at verses 11-12 in our text from Ecclesiastes. “…if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” (Ecclesiastes 4:11-12, NIV)

The picture in this text is of two people who are on a journey together through a remote and rugged territory. There were no hotels with a fireplace or a hot shower to warm you up. When night came, the temperature dropped, and your campfire died out, you had one way to keep warm: each other. If had personal space issues, that was too bad for you because to keep warm, you and your traveling companion had to lay down together and use your combined body heat to fend off the chill of the night air.

Not only was the night cold, but the night was dangerous when you were traveling the countryside. Bandits would often hide in the rocky crags of that area, and then come down to rob unsuspecting travelers at night. But as our text says, “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves.” It was another reason why you didn’t travel the countryside alone.

I recently discovered a show called Ice Road Truckers. Any of you seen it? It’s fascinating. Near the Artic Circle, there are some of the world’s most valuable diamond mines. These truckers bring supplies to the mine by driving an ice road. Literally, these trucks hauling 50 tons or more of supplies are driving across nothing but a frozen lake. You can hear the ice crack as the trucks rumble across the lake. It’s unbelievable.

One thing I learned very quickly from the show is that truckers aren’t allowed to run the ice road alone. They have to go in a convoy because the temperatures can reach 50 below zero. If they were alone and their truck were to stall somewhere on this 300 mile stretch of ice road, they would easily freeze to death. It’s just too dangerous to travel the road alone.

That’s the message of our text. Life’s road is too dangerous to travel alone. We need supporting friendships.

And all the while, our culture is running in the other direction. A recent survey indicated that less than 10% of homeowners in America know the names of their next door neighbors. People have built fences around their yards and they have built fences around their lives. They’re traveling the ice road alone, and it’s only a matter of time until their truck stalls out.

This is where the church has an opportunity to absolutely shine. In the church, people don’t have to truck on alone. In the church, they can find a network of supporting friendships…but that’s only if we remain vigilant. That only happens if we are intentional about caring for people who are hurting, whose lives are broken.

Look at these verses again. Who do you know who needs some warmth? Their life has grown cold and they need somebody to come alongside them and warm them up. Who needs a card of encouragement? Who needs a phone call or an email? Who needs a hug? Who needs you to take them out to dinner? Who needs a trip to Starbucks just so they can slow down and talk to you about what’s going on in their lives?

Who do you know who is under attack? “One may be overpowered, but two can defend themselves.” Who needs you to stand with them while they fight off life’s bandits?

If everyone here would commit to seeking out one person this week who needs some support and encouragement, if everyone would find that one person, think of the impact that would have. It would blow your mind.

Do you see why these kind of friendships crank up the decibels of our faith? Because it’s completely different, it runs completely counter to our culture. The irony is that in a culture where less than 10% of us know our next door neighbors, people’s deepest desire is community. The deepest desire of your life, the deepest desire of my life, and the deepest desire of anyone you will ever meet is community.

This is why Jesus said, “This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples—when they see the love you have for each other.” (John 13:35, The Message)

People will recognize Jesus in us when we love one another in the church and when we love those who aren’t yet in the church. In a world devoid of supporting friendships, that is exactly what people crave the most. And when we offer those kinds of relationships to them, the sound system of our faith is blaring.

There is one more type of friendship to explore in Ecclesiastes 4: saving friendships. Our faith decibels are never louder than when we have saving friendships.

Look at verse 10 in our text. “If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!” (Ecclesiastes 4:10, NIV)

Again, the picture is of two friends who are traveling rough terrain together. There were crevices in the rock that posed a great danger to travelers. In some of them, the pit was deep enough and the walls were steep enough that if you fell in, you would have no hope of getting out by yourself.

Not only that, but we’ve already mentioned the bandits who patrolled the main travel routes in these remote areas. These thugs would often dig pits on the pathway as traps for their victims. If you were by yourself and fell into one of these traps, you would stay there until the bandit came along and robbed you at his convenience.

We are surrounded by people who have fallen into a trap. It’s a trap laid by a very skilled bandit that we call Satan. His goal is to rob us of the life, and joy, and peace, and eternity that Jesus wants to offer us. He’s quite good at his work. Everyday we rub shoulders with people who have fallen into the trap he set in their lives.

Look at our verse again. If you are in Christ, then you had someone who loved you enough to help you out of the trap. Satan’s sin trap has ensnared every one of us, without exception. But somebody cared enough about you to develop a saving friendship with you. They cared enough to help you out of the pit.

But for some of us, our memories are awfully short. We have forgotten what it’s like to be lost. We have forgotten what it’s like to be trapped in that pit. And we’re not doing much to help other people out of it.

Let the words of Ecclesiastes sink into your heart. “Pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!” Satan is real. Sin is real. Hell is real. And yet a lot of Christ-followers don’t have a single non-Christian friend. Not one. Everyone in your circle is already a Christian. You don’t have any saving friendships because all of your friends are already saved. And because you aren’t developing relationships with people outside of Christ, the volume of your faith drops to a whisper.

If we hope to win people to Christ, we’ve got to understand the times we live in. Churches used to just cold call people. Just grab the phone book and start dialing. In the age of telemarketers and do-not-call lists, this is a huge turn off to the church. Churches also used to have “calling nights” where they’d go knock on doors and tell the person who answered about Jesus. Door-to-door salesmen and religious cults have made people very distrustful of anybody who just comes and knocks on their door.

But that doesn’t mean that we can’t do evangelism. We just have to know how to do it. The most effective method of evangelism is friendship evangelism. It is developing a relationship with someone and then sharing your faith with them. It is slow. It does take time. But it’s time that’s worth investing.

Bill Hybels tells the story of a guy named Mark in his book Becoming a Contagious Christian. Mark had tickets to a concert at his church. He knew the concert was going to be quality, so he invited the couple living next door.

When he told them about the concert, his neighbor, Scott, looked at his girlfriend and then awkwardly said, “Um…thanks anyway, but I don’t think we’ll go this time…but, well, if you’d ever like to get together in the backyard for a barbecue, let us know.”

“As they walked away, Mark thought to himself, ‘Why didn’t I think of that?

You’ve got to barbecue first!’”

And then Bill makes the following observation. “It’s so important that we make investments in friendships—what I call paying relational rent—in order to gain the person’s trust and respect, as well as to earn the right to talk to them about spiritual matters.” (Hybels, Bill and Mark Mittelberg. Becoming a Contagious Christian. City: Zondervan Publishing Company, 1996, pg. 98.)

There is a great distrust of the church in our culture today. We have to earn the right to be heard, and that happens in relationships, and relationships take time, and a lot of us have zero of these relationships cooking. We’re not developing any friendships that might lead someone to Christ.

This week there was a guy in my neighborhood who gave me an invitation to a hog roast that he’s having next Sunday. There was profanity on the invitation. I’m quite sure the beer will be flowing. And you know what? I’m going. I’ll be at that hog roast.

I fully understand that there is probably somebody in here whose head is about to explode hearing that their pastor is going to this kind of party. It’s the place that a lot of Christians wouldn’t be caught dead in, but it’s a place that will be full of people that Jesus died for. I know a lot of Christians wouldn’t go to this party, but I’m convinced that Jesus would, so I’m going. I’m going because you have to barbecue first. Is anyone going to come to Jesus at that party because I’m there? I doubt it, although I’ve learned to never say never when God is involved in something. My purpose is to start building a bridge with some of my neighbors. I haven’t earned the right to be heard yet. Because not only am I a Christian, but I’m also a pastor. That means I have not one, but two strikes against me. But it takes three strikes to get me out, and the only way I’ll get a third strike is if I never go to the party.

Some of you are going to the parties. You’re making saving friendships with your co-workers, your school mates, other parents, your neighbors, etc. Don’t stop just because you’re not seeing the results you want to see. Have patience and be faithful that God will reward these relationships you have built. Keep building. Keep barbecuing.

Others of us, it’s time to get out of our little holy huddle. Jesus went to where people are. He didn’t wait for them to come to him. And the people he went to had fallen deep into the trap that Satan had set for them. They were deep in sin, they were completely lost, and that’s exactly why he went to them. And it’s exactly why we have to go to them.

The time for a safe, secure, and quiet faith has past. It is time crank up the volume on our faith, beginning with the friendships that we are cultivating in our lives. Our world is listening. The only question is can they hear us?

Mike Edmisten

Tags: decibels, Ecclesiastes 4, encouragement, evangelism, friendship, unity