Amelia Church of Christ - Christian Church in Amelia, OH near Cincinnati in Clermont County

It’s finally time. We’re kicking off our new series called Man Up today. We’ve been waiting for this one. When our creative team met a few months ago to map out all the sermon series for 2010, we knew this one was going to be awesome. We’ve been waiting on this one, and we’re stoked that it’s finally here.

Is anybody else sick of the limp-wristed, weak, spineless, non-committal, wishy-washy men that we see everywhere today? Anybody else sick of grown men acting like frat boys? Anybody else sick of guys who believe their ability to have sex makes them a man? Anybody else sick of men who are AWOL in their families? I am.

Now, let’s hit a little closer to home. Anybody else sick of the notion that if a man is a Christian, then he has to be an effeminate, sissy, girly man? If a man loves Jesus, then he is automatically labeled as weak. Anybody else sick of that perception? I definitely am.

This series is all about changing the tide. I am sick of the picture of masculinity I see in our culture AND I am sick of the picture of masculinity that we paint in the church. Neither are right. Neither are God’s plan for men. And we’re going to dismantle these misconceptions in this series.

I’ll tell you upfront…this series is going to hit hard. We’re not going to mess around. At times, I might toe the line of what some would consider to be offensive. I promise you that, just like always, I will only preach the Bible. I will only teach the truths that God is laying on me. But when you look at the state of manhood today…it’s getting critical. It’s way too important to softball this stuff.

We’re going to spend the next four weeks exploring the Old Testament book of Ruth. It sounds so weird that a series about men is going to come from a book called Ruth. But in this book named after a woman, we meet a man’s man named Boaz. Over the next four weeks, we’re going to see how Boaz lived with a godly masculinity that is really hard to find among men today.

But before we get into this series, we need to know the background of this book. The book of Ruth is a short story in the Old Testament about a woman named Ruth, her mother-in-law Naomi, and Boaz who would eventually become Ruth’s husband.

Naomi’s husband, Elimelech, died. A few years later, Naomi’s two sons died as well. That left Naomi alone with her two daughters-in-law, Orpah and Ruth. This was a terrible spot to be in. In this culture, women were completely reliant on their husbands to sustain them and provide for them. Women were not allowed to have a job. The future looked very, very bad for these women.

So Naomi encouraged her daughters-in-law to leave her. She told them to go back to their homeland so they could find new husbands. After a while, Orpah was convinced. But Ruth refused to leave her mother-in-law.

The Bible says in Ruth 1, "Look," said Naomi, "your sister-in-law is going back to her people and her gods. Go back with her."

But Ruth replied, "Don't urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay.

Your people will be my people and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried. May the LORD deal with me, be it ever so severely, if anything but death separates you and me."

When Naomi realized that Ruth was determined to go with her, she stopped urging her.” (Ruth 1:15-18, NIV)

Naomi and Ruth returned to Naomi’s hometown of Bethlehem. And that’s where we’re going to kick off our series. These ladies have a huge problem. They are poor. They have no husbands. They need to find some way to provide for themselves in a culture that makes it nearly impossible.

Let’s pick it up in Ruth 2:2. “And Ruth the Moabitess said to Naomi, "Let me go to the fields and pick up the leftover grain behind anyone in whose eyes I find favor."

Naomi said to her, "Go ahead, my daughter." So she went out and began to glean in the fields behind the harvesters. As it turned out, she found herself working in a field belonging to Boaz, who was from the clan of Elimelech.” (Ruth 2:2-3, NIV)

Ruth had very few options to provide for herself and her aging mother-in-law. One of the very few options she had was something called gleaning. Gleaning was part of the Old Testament law.

In Leviticus 23, the law said, "'When you reap the harvest of your land, do not reap to the very edges of your field or gather the gleanings of your harvest. Leave them for the poor and the alien. I am the LORD your God.'" (Leviticus 23:22, NIV)

The Old Testament law commanded landowners to harvest their fields once. As they harvested the grain, some would naturally be dropped from the stalks. God commanded his people to leave the grain that was dropped behind. It was left so that poor people who had no fields of their own could walk behind the harvesters and pick it up, or glean it.

Gleaning was really a humiliating act. It was an admission that you had nothing. No social standing, no job, no money, no anything. But it was all Ruth could do. She willingly took on this humble task of gleaning.

This was also risky business. Ruth was a foreigner. She wasn’t an Israelite. She was from Moab. A foreign woman working by herself in a field would be an easy target for the workers. The possibility of abuse, or even rape, was very strong.

But through God’s providence, Ruth “just happened” to be gleaning in a field that belonged to Boaz.

The Bible describes Boaz as “a man of standing.” (Ruth 2:1, NIV) Other translations call him “a worthy man” (ESV) and “a man of outstanding character” (GWT).

That’s why we’re doing this series. Because men like that are getting harder and harder to find. Any woman who is looking for a husband would say amen to that! This series is all about reversing the trend. We want every man at ACC to be a Boaz. Guys, we’ve got enough Bozos. What we need are more Boazs.

That’s what we’re chasing after in this series. Let’s pray and we’ll get into it.

Boaz was not only a man of character, but he was a rich man. He was a seriously wealthy dude. But he used his money to glorify God and bless others.

It’s hard to find a man of character. It’s even harder to find a man who has character with money.

Guys, it’s time to man up your money.

So many guys act like idiots with their money. We usually stereotype women as the ones who can’t handle money. We usually think that women are the shopaholics. Women max out credit cards. Women buy overpriced clothes. Women have 50 pairs of shoes that they’ve never even worn. And yes, if a woman is treating money like this, it is stupid and destructive.

But guys, the statistics tell us that we can pretty much be idiots with money. We just do it in different ways.

Men spend more money eating out than women do.

We spend a lot more on electronics than women do. You know, all that “guy gear” that you’ve just gotta have…the new TV, the smart phone, the new sound system, the iPad. Guys spend way more on this stuff than gals do.

Men spend a ton more money on sports than women do. Whether it’s new golf clubs or Bengals season tickets, it’s guys who are dropping serious coin on sports.

And when it comes to cars, there is no comparison. Men spend more on cars than women by a landslide. Men tend to view their ride as a status symbol. Women tend to see it more realistically…a way to get from here to there.

Nicki told me recently that we should consider getting a minivan. I gave her a 30 minute presentation on why I would never have a minivan. Then I thought more about it later. My reasons were shallow and stupid. Someday, we’re probably going to own a minivan…and I don’t care what any other guy thinks about that. I don’t need my car to compensate for something. Maybe you do. And with that, I’d better move on.

Guys, statistics suggest that we make more money than women. But statistics also suggest that we can be pretty stupid with the money we make.

It’s time to man up our money. How does a strong, secure, godly man handle money? Let’s take a look at Boaz.

Ruth 2 starting in verse 8. “So Boaz said to Ruth, "My daughter, listen to me. Don't go and glean in another field and don't go away from here. Stay here with my servant girls. Watch the field where the men are harvesting, and follow along after the girls.

I have told the men not to touch you. And whenever you are thirsty, go and get a drink from the water jars the men have filled." (Ruth 2:8-9, NIV)

As far as we know, these are the first words that Boaz said to Ruth. And right away, we see what a real man does with wealth.

Boaz set Ruth up for financial success. He knew that Ruth was short on options and long on problems. She didn’t need another stumbling block to trip over or another obstacle to overcome. What she needed was someone who would set her up to succeed…and that’s exactly what Boaz did.

Look at everything he told her. He told her, “Don’t go glean in another field. In fact, don’t go away from here at all. Stay here.”

But he didn’t just tell her to stay in his field. He provided leadership to help her succeed. He told her exactly what to do. “Watch the field where the men are harvesting, and follow along after the girls.” In other words, he gave her leadership on where to go and what to do. He was incredibly specific.

He told Ruth that he had instructed his men not to touch her. We’re going to dig deep into this in a couple of weeks. I’ve got a message cooking for you on Father’s Day that you can’t miss. But for now, we need to see that Boaz created a safe environment for Ruth to succeed.

He told her that, if she got thirsty, she could help herself to the water jars that the men had filled. He didn’t have to do any of this. The law said that he had to allow Ruth to glean in his field, but he didn’t have to instruct her on how to do it. He didn’t have to provide water or protection for her. But he did, because that’s what men do. Boaz knew that Ruth was extremely poor and needed help, and he did all that he could to set her up to succeed.

Men, it is your job to set your family up for financial success. It is your job. If your family is experiencing financial success, then you and your wife should celebrate that as a team win. But if your family is in a financial mess, you have to own that as your individual responsibility.

“Well, that’s not fair. If we’re winning, it’s a team effort. But if we’re losing, it’s my fault. That’s not fair.”

It’s called leadership, dude. Nobody said it would be fair. And if you’re whining about how unfair this is, you are not ready to man up and lead your family. Men don’t whine. Men lead.

It is your job, as the spiritual leader of your home, to set your family up for financial success. Make no mistake about it. Money is a spiritual issue.

In fact, Jesus taught more about money than he did about heaven and hell combined. It is a spiritual issue.

Money is a leading cause of divorce in our country. In survey after survey, couples say that money is the thing that they fight about the most. It is the #1 cause of tension in our homes. And a lot of it is because men don’t lead in this area.

Let me give you a little glimpse into my family’s life…my wife is really good with finances. I’m really terrible. Math was always my worst subject. Seriously…I stopped understanding math when they started putting letters in it. That’s where you lost me.

But that doesn’t give me an excuse to bow out of my family’s finances. My wife takes care of the checkbook. She drafts our monthly budget. She does a lot of the day-to-day financial stuff simply because that is her gift and it is most definitely not mine.

But that doesn’t mean that I don’t lead. Even if Nicki is the primary manager of our money, I have to own my responsibility as the leader. Ultimately, my family’s financial health is my responsibility because I’m the spiritual leader of our family.

I am what Dave Ramsey calls a “free spirit.” Those of you who are in our Financial Peace University small group know exactly what I’m talking about. That’s me. I’m the free spirit. I’m the one who doesn’t want to talk about money. I just want to let it happen. And that’s the way our finances worked for a while in our marriage.

But I started noticing something…my wife was stressed out. Seriously. She was constantly worried. If something broke and needed repaired, she really started worrying. We lived our life like we were walking on eggshells, wondering what financial crisis was going to come our way today. I was kind of concerned about it at times, but Nicki would worry herself sick about it.

That was my fault. I own that 100%. That was my failure to step up and lead. Guys, if your wife is constantly stressed out about money, that is on you. You’ve got to own that and you’ve got to lead her out of that.

That’s why I am so high on Financial Peace University. It really did change our lives. But it meant that I was going to have to buckle down and get serious about it. It meant that I had to stop acting like such a free spirit and start acting like more of a nerd. Again, that’s some straight up Dave Ramsey goodness.

Listen…I didn’t like the idea of budgeting. I still don’t. I didn’t like the idea of depriving ourselves of things we want. I still don’t. But I do it. I do it because it’s my responsibility. I do it because it has changed my wife and it has changed my life. Our marriage has improved 100 fold because of this.

Nicki and I don’t stress about money anymore. We don’t fight about money anymore. I don’t see my wife walking through life stressed to the max anymore. And a lot of that started when I finally owned up to my God-given responsibility. It is my job to set my family up for financial success.

I’ve actually had guys tell me that it makes them mad when I say that Nicki and I don’t argue about money anymore. Well, if that makes you mad, do something about it. I’ve got news for you, bro…you can get mad at me if you want, but I’m not your problem. If this makes you mad, let your anger motivate you to action. Man up and do something about it in your own family.

That goes for any man here who is a husband and a father. It’s time to stop acting like financial fools and money morons. It’s time to man up with your money.

Now, check this out. In Ruth 2 stating in verse 14, the Bible says, “At mealtime Boaz said to [Ruth], "Come over here. Have some bread and dip it in the wine vinegar."

When she sat down with the harvesters, he offered her some roasted grain.

She ate all she wanted and had some left over. As she got up to glean, Boaz gave orders to his men, "Even if she gathers among the sheaves, don't embarrass her.

Rather, pull out some stalks for her from the bundles and leave them for her to pick up, and don't rebuke her." (Ruth 2:14-16, NIV)

This is easy to miss because we live in a very different culture than Boaz and Ruth did. What we’ve got to understand is that this scene was way, way, way out of the ordinary.

Boaz, a Jewish man, invited Ruth, a Gentile woman, to eat with him. That was not done. Never. Ever.

We’ve talked about this before. In this culture, who you had dinner with was very important. Jews viewed Gentiles as inferior in every way. Jews were the people of God. Gentiles were not. If a Jew had dinner with a Gentile, that was like saying that Jews and Gentiles were equal. That was unthinkable.

Now, add to that the fact that Ruth was a woman. I know this is touchy territory in our culture, but it wasn’t in this culture. Men and women had very strict codes of conduct in Boaz and Ruth’s culture.

For a Jewish man, inviting a foreign woman to come and eat with you broke every social protocol that you could imagine. And Boaz didn’t care. His character trumped societal convention. People would think he was weird, and he was good with that.

Men, you’ve got to be willing to be weird. As you pursue godly, financial health for your family, you’ll run into haters. Your friends might criticize you. Your own family might make fun of you.

I’ve had people laugh at what I drive. Like I said, some men get a lot of their significance from what they drive. Maybe that’s you. If so, I’ve got a question for you. You drove here today in your nice, shiny, super-expensive new car. I drove here today in my 1999 Ford Escort that has 176,000 miles on it.

Here’s my question…am I any less here today that you are? You drove here in a much nicer ride, but are you any more here than I am? In other words, my car did the exact same thing that yours did…it got me here. The only difference is mine didn’t put my family into a huge canyon of debt because it’s paid for.

The point is that you can hate on my car all you want. I just don’t care. And men, that’s the attitude that we’ve got to have about our families’ finances. When it comes to your money, you just cannot afford to care about what everyone else thinks.

You have to have laser-like focus on the goal. Getting out of debt. Saving money. Planning for the future. And making whatever sacrifices are necessary to get there.

Don’t listen to someone who is up to their hairline in debt tell you how to manage your money. Don’t let someone who worships at the altar of Visa and MasterCard make fun of your financial sacrifices. Ignore them. Dismiss them.

Anytime you do anything that has godly significance, you will have detractors, critics, and haters. That’s one thing that leading a church has taught me over and over again. I get criticism from people inside and outside of this church. People who know me and people who have never met me criticize me. It’s an occupational hazard that comes with leadership.

And men, as leaders in your home, don’t think that this doesn’t apply to you. It absolutely does. The more godly leadership you provide in your home, the more criticism and attacks will come. But think about it this way…you only get tackled when you’re carrying the ball. If you’ve got the ball and you’re heading for the end zone, expect to get hit.

But it doesn’t matter how many times you get tackled. If you keep making progress, if you keep making first downs, you’re going to score. It doesn’t matter how many hits you take along the way.

It’s one of the hardest things to do as a leader, but you’ve got to develop a godly indifference. Men, one of the most spiritual things you can say is, “I don’t care.” Now, it’s not spiritual to say that to your wife or your kids. But in a lot of other scenarios, the most godly thing you can say is, “I don’t care.” You’ve got to develop this godly indifference.

You just can’t afford to care about everyone’s opinion. And when it comes to finances, everybody has an opinion. But you don’t need to listen to them. You need to listen to God’s Word. You need to be in constant conversation with your wife. You need to pray and work until you reach common ground with your finances. And then you both need to work like dogs toward your goals, with you taking the lead, men. And after that, let the haters say whatever they want. It just doesn’t matter.

Now, let’s go back and read these verses again. “At mealtime Boaz said to [Ruth], "Come over here. Have some bread and dip it in the wine vinegar."

When she sat down with the harvesters, he offered her some roasted grain.

She ate all she wanted and had some left over. As she got up to glean, Boaz gave orders to his men, "Even if she gathers among the sheaves, don't embarrass her.

Rather, pull out some stalks for her from the bundles and leave them for her to pick up, and don't rebuke her." (Ruth 2:14-16, NIV)

Boaz also lived out this simple truth: real men are generous.

He offered Ruth all she could eat and then some. And then, when she went back to work, he pulled his men aside and whispered to them, “Look guys, I don’t want you to say a word to her. Even if she goes where she’s not supposed to go, keep your mouth shut. In fact, I want you to drop some stalks on purpose for her to pick up.”

This is way above and beyond anything that Boaz had to do legally. But generosity has part of his DNA. That’s true for any man of God.

Gentlemen, if your family isn’t tithing, it’s up to you to change that. If generosity toward those less fortunate than you isn’t in your family’s financial plan, you have to take the lead to make it happen.

Jesus said, “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” (Luke 12:34, NIV)

Your money reveals who you are. Guys, you can try to hide. You can try to fool everybody. But your money will tell your secrets.

Your money reveals your heart. Jesus said so Himself. Your money reveals what is important to you. How you handle money lets your wife and kids and everyone else know who you really are. It lets everybody know how much of a man you really are.

Now, here’s the beautiful thing about all of this…second chances are available. A lot of us are not handling our finances in a godly way. A lot of men in this room have shirked their leadership role in the family’s finances.

Here’s the beautiful truth…God is a God of second chances. There is a second chance to honor God with your money. There is a second chance to honor God in your family. There is a second chance to honor God with your life.

That’s what the cross is all about. It is God telling all of us, “Yes, you’ve screwed up. You’ve really made a mess of things. But my grace is bigger than that. I forgive all your sins and shortcomings. And I’m telling you that you can have another chance at the life that I desire for you.”

Mike Edmisten

Tags: Boaz, Man Up, men, money, Ruth