Amelia Church of Christ - Christian Church in Amelia, OH near Cincinnati in Clermont County

Welcome to week #3 of our series called Death By Love. In this series, we’re digging deep into the seven statements that Jesus made as He hung on the cross.

God is rocking my world in this series. Last week, God changed our church. I absolutely believe that. We are not the same church that we were one week ago. God changed us last week.

Last week, we were put on notice. We will not do church-as-usual around here. We will not play games around here. We will not be fake around here. We will not worship sacred cows around here. We will not be religious around here.

Instead, Jesus is calling us to be broken. He is calling us to be honest and real about our brokenness, our struggles, our pain, and our disappointments. But there is real freedom there.

Church-as-usual is not freedom. It’s a prison. It’s a prison because you have to be somebody you’re not. You’ve got to wear the right clothes, say the right words, and play the right games. There is no freedom there.

Freedom comes from this truth. When I am weak, then I am strong. That’s freedom. It’s freedom because you come to understand that it’s not about you and it’s not all on you. When we are weak, we allow God’s power to go to work.

We are a weak church. And that makes us a strong church. I don’t ever want to be a church that runs on human power. I want to be a church that owns our human weakness, which allows God’s power to go to work. And we saw that happen last week. We saw what happens when we own our brokenness, and then get out of God’s way and allow Him to go to work.

Which brings us to this week in our Death By Love series. This week, we’re going to explore the third statement that Jesus made from the cross. It is a statement that, at first glance, really doesn’t seem to have much of anything to do with us. But God blew me away with the truth I found in this passage.

I’m going to get in your kitchen today. This is tense stuff. But it is something that we all need to face.

We’re going to be in John 19 today. Let’s pray and we’ll get things rolling.

“Near the cross of Jesus stood his mother, his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene. When Jesus saw his mother there, and the disciple whom he loved standing nearby, he said to her, “Woman, here is your son,” and to the disciple, “Here is your mother.” From that time on, this disciple took her into his home.” (John 19:25-27, NIV)

This third statement from the cross shows a very compassionate side of Jesus. As He hung on the cross, He wanted to be sure that His mother was taken care of. There’s a whole message in that truth right there, but that’s not where we’re going to focus today.

This morning we’re going to focus more on the setting of this statement than on the words themselves. As Jesus was speaking, what was happening around him? What was happening is that He realized that nearly everyone sold him out. Almost everyone that was close to Jesus left him when he needed them the most.

We have learned earlier in this series that there was quite a crowd present at Jesus’ crucifixion. In this brutal culture, crucifixions were a big event. People would come out in droves to watch crucifixions. They would pack picnic lunches and bring their families to spend the day watching as the victims were beaten and tortured, and then to watch as they died this very slow, agonizing death. It was a brutal culture to live in.

We know that there were a lot of people at the crucifixion of Jesus. Most were there to insult and make fun of him. This is why people came to crucifixions. This was the sport of it. This is what made it fun. Insulting and making fun of the victims. Jesus’ crucifixion was no different.

The huge crowd was there to mock. Only five were there to mourn. The other gospels tell us that some of Jesus followers looked at the cross from a safe distance, but only five were willing to come close to mourn.

This group of mourners consisted of 1. Mary, the mother of Jesus, 2. Jesus’ aunt (we’re not told her name), 3. Mary, the wife of Clopas, 4. Mary Magdalene, 5. and the disciple whom Jesus loved (most likely John, who wrote this account that we’re talking about today).

When Jesus said, “Here is your son,” and “Here is your mother,” it was an incredible demonstration of love and compassion. But let’s go a little deeper. This is more than a heart wrenching scene between a mother and her dying son.

As you look at the setting of this particular scene from the crucifixion, you figure out that it is a scene that begs a question.

Why were there only five mourners present? Why were there only five people who loved Jesus enough to be present at his death? Why only five? Jesus touched hundreds, probably thousands, of lives. Where were they?

Jesus had 12 disciples. Why was only one present at the cross? Why was John the only one of the 12 to show up? John…the youngest of all the disciples…the teenager…why was he the only one there?

There’s a tragic verse that gives us a lot of insight into this. Jesus had just been arrested by a mob, armed with swords and clubs. As they were leading Jesus away to this kangaroo court where he would stand trial, Jesus turned around to look for his disciples, the ones who had sworn never to leave his side.

And Matthew 26:56 tells us, “Then all the disciples deserted him and fled.” (Matthew 26:56b, NIV)

Out of the 12 disciples, and out of the countless people that Jesus touched, taught, and healed, a grand total of five were at the cross. Everyone else bailed out.

Why? To answer that question, we have to look at the cross through new eyes. We have to step back in time and look at the cross differently than we ever have before.

The cross of Christ is the central symbol of our faith. But it wasn’t always that way. The cross was not the central symbol of the church in its earliest years, because it was too offensive. It wasn’t until the 4th century, after the Roman government had made crucifixion illegal, that the church began to mark itself with the cross.

What makes the cross so offensive? Why was the cross so offensive that so many people in Jesus’ life didn’t even want to be near it? There are at least three reasons.

First of all, the cross was a disappointment.

We’ve all experienced disappointments, but when we’re talking about how people felt about Jesus’ crucifixion, we’re talking disappointment on a mammoth scale. It was huge.

During Jesus’ lifetime, the Jewish people lived under the rule of the Roman Empire. The Romans ruled over the Jews with an iron fist. They taxed them, they beat them, they put them into slavery. That was the backdrop for Jesus as He entered into the world. That is the setting when Jesus comes on the scene.

When Jesus showed up, He started preaching and teaching about the kingdom of God. In Luke 8, the Bible says, “Jesus traveled about from one town and village to another, proclaiming the good news of the kingdom of God.” (Luke 8:1, NIV)

The Bible tells us over and over again that Jesus was preaching about the Kingdom of God. But a lot of people never heard the words “of God.” They just heard Jesus talking about a new kingdom.

In other words, they believed that Jesus was talking about a political kingdom. They thought that Jesus was going to overthrow the Romans. And instead, he was executed by the Romans.

Can you imagine the disappointment? Instead of overthrowing the Romans, Jesus was killed by the Romans. That’s why so many of Jesus’ bailed out on Him at the end. Because the cross was an incredible disappointment. Jesus didn’t live up to their expectations, so they abandoned him.

What do you do when Jesus disappoints you? Some of you are probably even uncomfortable with the question. It sounds sinful, even heretical, to suggest that Jesus can disappoint us. But if you follow Jesus long enough, I guarantee you that he’ll disappoint you.

There are seasons when we’re surprised, frustrated, angry and disappointed when God doesn’t come through like we think He should. We feel like we’ve held up our end of the bargain. We’ve prayed. We’ve been faithful. We’ve waited expectantly for an answer…but none seems to come.

We are disappointed by Jesus for the very same reason that His followers were disappointed by Him.

The Bible says that Jesus came to preach the Kingdom of God, not the kingdom of me.

Jesus’ followers were so disappointed that they abandoned Jesus because the Kingdom of God didn’t line up with the kingdom of me. They wanted a new government. They wanted Jesus to whip the Romans. They wanted Jesus to accomplish their agenda. So when they saw the cross, they didn’t just see that Jesus was dying. They also saw the death of their dreams. They had all these expectations for Jesus, and He fell short on every one of them.

But Jesus is about the Kingdom of God, not the kingdom of me. That’s what He was about then, and that’s what He’s about now.

Jesus is all about His Kingdom. And He’s not at all about your kingdom.

A lot of us expect Jesus to cater to our every whim and desire. If you’re looking for a genie in a bottle, then you’re looking for Christina Aguilera but you’re not looking for Jesus.

Jesus is about His kingdom, not your kingdom.

If you don’t think that most Christians have this backwards, you don’t have to look any further than their relationship with God’s church. We expect His church to meet our every expectation…all the way down the music that is played and the color of the carpet and the temperature inside the church building.

When we come to church, it’s all about what I can get out of it. It’s all about, “Did I like the sermon today?” or “Did I enjoy that?”

Can I tell you something? We don’t do one thing here so you can enjoy it. We’re not entertainers. Our worship band isn’t here to play a concert for you. Our children’s ministry workers aren’t here to babysit your kids. And I’m not here to do stand-up comedy or to give a motivational speech.

We are here to be agents of God that will effect change in your life. We are here to encourage you when you need to be encouraged and to break you in two when you need to be broken. But we’re not here to entertain you.

The measure of our effectiveness is not whether or not you enjoy what happens here today. The measure of our effectiveness is did you encounter God is a powerful, real, applicable way?

And if you do encounter God, it’s very likely that you won’t enjoy it. Because a true encounter God will mess you up.

We have got to take this consumeristic mindset that is everywhere in the church today and put it to death. I don’t want to pardon it. I don’t want to imprison it. I want to hand down a death sentence for it.

The question for each of us is, “Am I a consumer, or am I consumed?”

When you are a consumer, the question is, “What’s in it for me?”

When you are consumed…when you are absolutely consumed with God and His Word and His priorities and His Spirit…you never ask, “What’s in it for me?” That question isn’t even on your radar.

Instead, you will ask questions like, “Are God’s purposes being accomplished? Are the lost being saved? Are the broken being healed? And what can I do to advance the mission? What can I bring that will accomplish our vision?”

Are you a consumer? Or are you consumed?

Most of Jesus’ followers were consumers. They were following Jesus because they fully expected Him to cater to their desire. Their desire was simple…overthrow Rome. That was what they chose off the menu and they were expecting Jesus to be their waiter and serve it to them piping hot.

John tells us that only five of Jesus’ followers were not consumers. Instead, they were consumed. They were so consumed with Jesus that, even though they didn’t understand the cross…even though they couldn’t grasp what was happening…they weren’t going to leave Him.

That’s how you know you’re consumed. When you don’t get it…when nothing makes sense…when you have no idea what God is doing in your life…when He falls silent and you feel abandoned…you stay with Him anyway. You stay with Him because you know that this dark season won’t last forever. The season of crucifixion won’t last forever. The season of resurrection is coming.

Those who are consumed will wait for it…and they’ll stick with Jesus as they do.

There is a second reason that a lot of people left Jesus. The cross was a sign of defeat.

Crucifixion was a means of execution that Romans used often, but did you know that it was illegal for Romans to crucify their own citizens unless they betrayed the Roman government? Crucifixion was reserved for foreigners…people that the Romans didn’t even believe were fully human…like the Jews…and like Jesus.

We talked about how brutal the Romans were to the Jewish people. Well, it’s not surprising that every once in a while, a group of Jews would get together and say, “Hey, we don’t like living like this. Let’s do something about it. Let’s rebel!”

So they would organize a rebel movement, they would have their guerilla fighters, and they would begin their revolution, not unlike the rebel fighters that we’ve seen in Libya recently.

And every time this type of rebellion would begin, the Roman government would unleash the full force of its military and the revolt would be crushed. And for the rebels who were captured, there was a special punishment reserved for them…crucifixion.

We know of times where the Romans crucified as many as 2,000 rebels at one time. Do you see why a lot of people would run the other way when Jesus was arrested? They didn’t want to be associated with the revolution that Jesus had started because crucifixion was a sign that the movement had been defeated.

Now, with this in mind, look at what Jesus said in Matthew 10:38, Jesus said, “Whoever does not take up their cross and follow me is not worthy of me.” (Matthew 10:38, NIV)

In 21st century America, we hear these words very differently than a 1st century Jew would have heard them. We wear the cross as jewelry. We put it on t-shirts. Some of you are wearing crosses right now.

We use it as decorations in our churches. Years ago, knights would put a cross on their shields as they went to battle. We see the cross as a beautiful symbol of victory.

But to the people of Jesus’ day, it was exactly the opposite. Mark Moore said that the cross wasn’t about victors going out to battle. It was about losers who got caught.

When Jesus tells us to pick up our cross and follow him, understand what he was saying. Mark Moore goes on to describe it this way. When Jesus said pick up your cross and follow me, he was saying, “If you want to follow me, get in line and join the revolution that has already failed.”

The cross was a sign of defeat. That’s why people left Jesus at his crucifixion and that’s why people still leave him today. To follow Jesus, you’ve got to become a loser.

Think about the message of the gospel. To live for God, we have to die to ourselves. To become the greatest, you must become a servant. We are called to love our enemies and pray for those who persecute us. Our priorities are backwards from those of our culture. We live in a culture that worships winners. Why do you think Charlie Sheen keeps proclaiming that he is winning? Because he knows our culture loves a winner.

But to follow Jesus, you’ve got to lose. You are called to be a loser in every way that our world evaluates winners and losers. But the mystery of God is that his kingdom is an upside-down, topsy-turvy kingdom. By losing, we win. By dying, we live. It’s completely backwards from everything we are ever taught in our culture about what it means to be a winner and a loser.

Ted Turner is famous for saying that Christianity is a religion for losers. Actually, he’s right. By his standards, but our entire culture’s standards, following Jesus makes you a loser. Serve instead of take? Forgive instead of get even? That’s what it means to be a backwards, upside-down follower of Jesus. The question is, are you willing to be a failure, to be a loser, in the eyes of your friends and your culture? Because that’s what it means to take up your cross and follow Jesus.

What are you willing to lose because of Jesus?

Are you willing to lose your family because of Him? Some of you have. Some of you will. A lot of us have family that will reject us because of our commitment to Christ.

We’ve looked at one verse from Matthew 10. Let’s pull back a little bit more and see it in context. Jesus said, “Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword. For I have come to turn ‘a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law— a man’s enemies will be the members of his own household.’

Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. Whoever does not take up their cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it.” (Matthew 10:34-39, NIV)

Jesus promised us that families would divide because of Him. If it happens in your family, are you willing to accept it? Are you willing to be ok with it?

I’m not saying you don’t try to salvage the relationships, but if it becomes clear that your family has rejected you because of your faith, are you ok with that?

What are you willing to give up for Jesus? What are you willing to lose for His sake? Are you willing to lose your family?

Are you willing to lose your friends? For some of us, we’re a lot closer to our friends than our family. Which of your friends is more important than Jesus? If your friends walked away…completely abandoned you because of your faith in Jesus…would you be ok with that?

Are you willing to lose a boyfriend or a girlfriend for Jesus? For some of you, you’re in a dead end relationship. The person you’re dating doesn’t love Jesus. You know it, but you ignore it. You convince yourself that it’s ok because at least you have someone.

You know what’s worse than marrying no one? Marrying the wrong someone.

Jesus is calling you to leave that relationship behind. Are you going to listen? Are you going to value Jesus or this other person more?

What are you willing to give up for the cause of Christ? What are you not willing to give up? What price would just be too high?

Jesus said that, “Whoever does not take up their cross and follow me is not worthy of me.” (Matthew 10:38, NIV)

In other words, “Whoever is not willing to lose everything for my sake is not worthy of me.”

That is a very, very hard truth for American Christians to accept. We have so much. Even in a down economy, many of us have far more than we need.

You know where they can easily accept this truth. Places like Haiti. Places where they have little, and even what they had is now gone due to the massive earthquake last year.

But Jesus didn’t give any qualifiers with this command. This command isn’t just for Haitian Christians, with a special exemption for Americans.

If you believe in Jesus, then this is the gauntlet that He lays down for you. “What are you willing to give up for Me? What are you not willing to give up for Me? If there is anything that you will not give up for Me, you are not worthy of Me.”

There is a third reason that Jesus was abandoned by nearly everyone who had followed him at one time. The cross demands a decision.

My wife and I don’t fight very often. But I’ll tell you when we do fight: when we’re going out to dinner. We fight because neither one of us wants to pick the place!

One time we told a friend of ours how ridiculous this can get. I told him that there are times when I just pull over and say, “I’m not moving another inch until I know where I’m going!” (Some of you guys have done that, haven’t you?)

Our friend rolled his eyes and said, “The next time that happens, just call me and I’ll tell you where to go!”

It is pretty ridiculous. But the truth is that a lot of us are live our lives like that. We’re incredibly indecisive. We think that something better may come along, so we don’t like to make commitments. We want to keep our options open. But the cross doesn’t allow for that. The cross demands a decision.

Did you ever wonder why God didn’t just create us like robots? Why didn’t he design us so that we could only do whatever he wanted us to do? The reason he didn’t create us like that is because real love involves choice. Real love is a decision. God wants us to love him by choosing him. That’s why he chose us.

When Jesus was arrested in the Garden of Gethsemane, Peter drew his sword and started to fight. But in Matthew 26, Jesus told him, “Put your sword back in its place…for all who draw the sword will die by the sword. Do you think I cannot call on my Father, and he will at once put at my disposal more than twelve legions of angels? But how then would the Scriptures be fulfilled that say it must happen in this way?” (Matthew 26:52-54, NIV)

Jesus could have called down twelve legions of angels to help Him. A legion was the largest unit in the Roman military. A legion consisted of about 6,000 soldiers. So Jesus had around 72,000 angels at His command. One angel would have done the trick, and yet Jesus could have called down 72,000.

Mark Batterson points out that the New Testament talks about two different kinds of power. The Greek words are dunamis and exousia.

Dunamis is the ability to do things beyond your natural ability. Jesus possessed incredible dunamis. He made the lame walk. He healed the sick. He raised the dead.

But His most impressive power was His exousia. Exousia is the power to NOT do things that you have the ability to do.

Jesus had the power to call down 72,000 angels to help Him. But it took even greater power not to do it.

Mark Batterson wrote, “It’s not what [Jesus] could do that changed my life. It’s what He could have done but chose not to do that changed me.”

Jesus had the power to stop the crucifixion. He didn’t have to do it. But in a show of even greater power, He decided not to stop it.

At any point, Jesus could have said, “That’s enough. I’m done. Come on, angels.” But instead, He decided to suffer and he decided to die. He made a conscious, intentional decision to give his life for you and for me. And this decision of Jesus demands a decision from us.

You need to know this about Jesus. Jesus demands a decision. The cross demands a decision. The empty tomb demands a decision.

Some of you have put off the decision for way too long. You come and go every single Sunday. You hear about Jesus. You know it’s true. But you never make a decision for Him.

As your pastor, I’m calling you out. I’m calling you out because I love you. And I’m calling you out because it’s time for you to stop making light of the situation.

Let me lay it out for you. Heaven is real. Hell is just as real. The game changer is the cross. The difference maker is Jesus. Either you will cross over from death to life because you make a decision for Christ, or you will remain in death because you put it off.

But even after that salvation decision, we need to understand that Jesus still demands a decision. The cross demands a decision from us every single day of our lives.

The cross demands a decision to trust God when it doesn’t make sense, to live by his standards instead of my own, to serve when I would rather be served, to give when I would rather take, to forgive when I would rather get revenge, to live for his glory instead of my own, and to be a loser instead of a winner.

You want to know why so many people ran away from the cross? Because they wouldn’t make these kind of decisions. That’s why people ran from the cross then, and it’s why they run from the cross now.

This is why the cross is so offensive to so many people. That’s why so many people run in the other direction. Jesus demands decisions from us that we don’t want to make.

In our multicultural, pluralistic world, we’re told that, “It doesn’t matter what decisions you make. Anything you choose is good. If it’s right for you, then it’s right. Make any decision you want. They’re all good.”

And Jesus says, “No. It doesn’t work that way. I demand that you make a decision about me. Follow me or reject me. But a decision is required.”

People didn’t leave Jesus because He was too tolerant. They left Him because He was too demanding.

Matthew 26:56 is one of the most heartbreaking verses in all of Scripture. “Then all the disciples deserted him and fled.” (Matthew 26:56b, NIV)

Are you running away? Some of you have been running away your whole life. You know that Jesus is calling you to come to Him, but you’ve never listened. You’ve been close at times, but you’ve always run away.

Others of you did come to Jesus. You gave your life to Him. But at some point, you turned around. And today you find yourself a long, long way from Jesus. You’re not sure how you got where you are today, but you know you’ve been running from Him.

Here’s what today can mean for you. It can be the day of the 180°. Today you can make that 180° turn. Instead of running away from Jesus, you can turn around and run back to Him.

In James 4, the Bible says, “Come near to God and he will come near to you.” (James 4:8a, NIV)

When you make that 180° and start running back to Jesus, what you’ll find is that He has been sprinting after you the whole time. When you decide to run to Him, you’ll find that He is actually running after you.

You are running. Every single person in this room is running. The only question is the direction. Are you running toward or away from Jesus?

If you’re running away, I’ve got a question for you. Aren’t you tired?

In Matthew 11, Jesus said, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28, NIV)

Today is the day of the 180°. Lots of people ran away from the cross. A few ran toward it. Today is the day of the 180°. It’s the day when you can choose to leave the many, and join the few. To stop running away from Jesus and start running toward Him.

Run toward Him because He loves you. Run toward Him because He forgives you. Run toward Him because He died for you. Run toward Him because He rose for you. Run toward Him because He frees you. Run toward Him because He saves you.

Which direction are you going to run today?

Mike Edmisten

Tags: cross, Death By Love, decisions, defeat, disappointment, grace, Jesus, John 19, Kingdom of God, repentance,